Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Day 126 - Flamingos & Fretting

"Sarah, what's with the flamingos?" you might be asking.  As any survivor/graduate of Columbus College of Art & Design will tell you, one of the rights of passage during freshman year is a semester-long series wherein you must pick one animal and do a series of drawings/assignments based on that animal.

Guess what mine was?

As a result, I have a sort of soft spot for flamingos... which is funny because birds in general tend to eek me out a bit.  Anyway, I've wanted for years to retool one particular drawing from that assignment and I've finally started to get serious about it.  The original drawing is somewhere in the mountainous regions of my office closet but about five years ago I tried to start it up again.  It goes something like this:

But I can do better now (I hope) and want to change the house to an Airstream trailer parked at an RV camp.  So here are my plastic lawn flamingo and real flamingo that I started on today.

My challenge is making a "realistic" flamingo but instilling it with some personality/anger.  We'll see how it goes.

May I blather on about myself for a moment?  I don't do a lot of finished, colored things yet.  Even though getting myself to draw every day is nothing short of a miracle, I think a part of me is still scared to do it.  I still have a tenuous view of my abilities or lack thereof.  I spent many years not working on much of anything and I'm still hesitant to do more than just sketches on a regular basis for fear I'm going to find out that, yes, I really am a fraud.  I'm fearful of finishing things because while they're still unfinished and still in my head I don't have to face the fact that it may not turn out as good as I'd hoped (i.e. I'm not good enough to make it "good enough".)  I truck along doing just fine sometimes and then one day I'll see an illustration by someone light years more talented that I am and... poof.. there goes any sense of worth I had managed to accumulate.

So in case you were wondering why it is that I don't do many finished pieces... there you have it.

(My thanks to you for indulging me in that "Dear Diary" moment.)

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